Live Simply

the day after new years this year i sat and pondered on new years solutions:

-forget myself 

-quit not being fit

-do better

-live happier

-call more

-look more

-do more

-wish more

-read more

-play more

-say more

-more

-more

-more

which all of this "shoulding" on myself naturally put me into a state of "more"-ning. 

i wasn't doing enough.

i didn't have enough.

i wasn't.... enough.

it was then that i realized that i had forgot what it meant to

simply.

just.

live.

to breath.

to create.

to engulf.

to enjoy.

to learn.

to wait.

to imagine.

and most importantly.....

to LOVE.

to love without any expectations, without limits, and without telling myself that i didn't deserve it. 

instead of acting i became the victim who was being acted upon.

this state of mind was familiar to me, and i feel is a reoccuring theme for all of us. truth and reality is:

we are at war.

with a being who is so focused, so determined, and so craving for us to fail... to covet... to doubt... and to fear. if the adversary can get us to act any of these... he feels he has succeeded... and we then feel defeated.

what a comfort and all-consuming peace it is to me... that i am on the same side of the battlefield with my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ... fighting His war... for His cause. 

It is He who makes up the difference, picks up my slack, and without fail... 

strengthens

refines

and qualifies me to 

simply.

just.

live.

it is in simplicity that we find the most joy. for me as of late... my simplys are patterned with the good morning beautifuls, birds in the sunlight, six strings, vocal chords, baby niece face giggles, temple visits, best friend Lingo talks, spring colors, new music, new direction, my view through a lens, good news, support, and new family members added stationed in Bountiful and Provo. all of these and many more are what pushes the "shoulds" and the "mores" out of my head.

this past year... March 2011-March 2012, have provided and given me some of the hardest, happiest, most doubting, most spiritual, most trying,

but the absolute most refining experiences i have had all throughout my entire existence.

personal battles.

family triumphs.

family heartaches.

efy.

new friends.

mission papers.

mission call.

and the most refining: meeting my life-long, as well as, eternally perfect companion that i could not be any more grateful for. 

he has been, and is, the answer to so many questions i have had.

i'm healthy.

i'm happy.

i'm blessed.

i'm creating.

i'm imagining.

i'm learning.

i'm loving... oh how i'm loving!

and to put it simply...

i am living. and have never been so lucky and blessed to do so.

-l.t.